Bloopers from Church Bulletins
From The Norton Buzz, August 3, 2000.
- Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.
- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.
- Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7PM. Please use the back door.
- The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing "Break Forth Into Joy".
- A songfest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.
- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.
- The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7PM. The Congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
- Thursday night potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
- The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Adams.
- Tuesday at 4PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.
- A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
- At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.
- Weight Watchers will meet at 7PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
- Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.
- Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan who are preparing for the girth of their first child.
- The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6PM. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.
- The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge -- Up Yours."
- Our next song is "Angels We Have Heard Get High."
- Don't let worry kill you; let the church help.
- For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
- This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
- The service will close with Little Drops of Water. One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
- Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
- The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning, to join the choir.
